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Hash Around The Globe- July 1999

By: Conrad Matt

The Hash is not the same as the brown stuff you buy in coffee shops in Amsterdam. Although Amsterdam does have its own Hash. No, The Hash is much more than its name suggests. In fact, it is really called The Hash House Harriers or HHH for short.

What is The Hash?

Basically, it’s a drinking club with a running problem operating in nearly 184 countries with over 100,000 members.

Most people I come across and invite to a Hash, have never heard of it so I usually then point them to Stray Dog’s HHH web site which is probably one of the most comprehensive web sites on Hashing, and a good jumping off point to find the closest HHH club to your location. I have often accessed the site from Internet cafes during my travels to find the nearest club and join them for a Hash. It’s a great way to meet fun, like-minded people in a new town and it’s probably the best place to find authorities on the local brewing specialties.

How do you start Hashing?

Well, first you need the contact numbers of the local Hash Committee (posted on Stray Dog’s site), then you call up and get directions and times of the next Hash. As the saying goes “If you have half a mind to join The Hash, that’s all it takes.” Otherwise you could wait around forever until you find that good samaritan who will take you along to his/her Hash.

I remember my first Hash in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. I was given a hand-drawn map (Hashes in Saudi are in the boonies) advising when to turn off the asphalt road, and for how many kilometers to follow a certain camel track. Driving at reckless speeds over rough terrain in the most durable vehicle ever invented (The Company Car) I finally came across a gathering of 30-40 other durable cars out in the middle of the desert.

Once at the Hash site, the events change little from Hash to Hash. You find the Hash Cash (a small fee is charged to cover The Official Hash Liquid – Beer), who signs you up so that they know if they’ve lost someone out in the desert at the end of the Hash. A brief circle is formed with an explanation of the trail markings, and off you go running or walking, following the obnoxious chap with the loud horn marking the ‘True Trail’. Hopefully, somewhere on the trail will be a Beer Check, a point to shoot the breeze with fellow Hashers and down a few cold ones. (Recently on a the Frankfurt Hash we had an Ouzo Check, then a Beer Check, then a Gin & Tonic Check!) Then it’s OnOn (keep going) to the OnIn (stop and rest) and the DownDowns (drink beer).

At the end of the run/walk, is the OnIn where the Hash Ceremonies take place. One of these ceremonies is the Naming wherein a poor Hasher gets a Hash Name. Mine happens to be Toejam, though the story of the origin differs from the definition. New members are welcomed “Who made you come?” and jubilees are celebrated in proper Hash style (Some veterans have over 1,000 runs.) Afterwards it’s usually on to the local pub.

Every Hash is different. Some are male only, some are female only, but most are mixed. Some Hashes sing lewd Hash songs, some don’t. Some Hashes may cover you in bright colored ‘gunge’, other ones won’t. Most Hashes have a Hash Haberdasher who, for a small price, will outfit you with some stunning Hash Duds. Some Hashes run, others walk and some even bike. But at all Hashes you should find fun folks who aren’t easily offended, but are sociable and outgoing.

So if you have half a mind, come on out and join the fun!

In addition to regular local Hashes, there are other regional shindigs like….

Country Nash Hashes,

the Americas Interhash,

the Eurohash, and that big party known as the World Interhash.

Hash Terminology

Trail – Usually marked with flour, but in Alexandria, Egypt I’ve seen them use orange lentils.

On-On! – What you say if you’re on the trail.

Check – A marked sign indicating the trail has ended and starts again somewhere in a 100 meter radius of the check. Hashers fan out to find trail.

Titty Check – A check where only women can go and find the trail. Used as a tool to keep the pack together.

Beer Check – Stop. Drink Beer.

False Trail – Go back to the check and look for another trail.

Checking – What you say when you’re looking for the trail.

Checking One – what you say when you find the first mark after a check.

Checking Two – See above. When you find the third mark, you yell On-On!

Are You? – What you yell when you see people looking for the trail, and you don’t know if they’ve found it or not.

Organization

Although the Hash looks like a motley disorganized crew, there is usually a Committee that gets elected to organize the Hash. Organization is important if you’re carrying loads of beer in your trunk in Saudi Arabia.

Hash Committee Positions

Hash Cash – The Hasher who collects your dues

Hash Haberdasher – Maker and Seller of Hash Gear

On-Sec – Keeps the Hash roster and takes notes at Committee meetings

Hare Razor – Schedules Hares to set Hashes

Religious Advisor – Keeper of Hash Traditions

Grandmaster or Grandmistress – Hash President

Hash Flash – Someone who takes pictures along the Hash for publication or sale (proceeds go to Hash Cash)

Hash Beermaster – Self Explanatory

General Info

The Hash House Harriers is a worldwide organization that promotes beer drinking, camaraderie, fun and friendship with a little fitness thrown in.

Not everybody is destined to be a Hasher though it seems as though Brits, Aussies, Kiwis, and Yanks are predisposed with the qualities it takes to be a good Hasher. Many people I’ve met at Hashes admit to thinking “I’m not going to join this bunch of degenerates!” after participating in their first Hash, but most eventually loosen up and get into the act.

Are you one of them?

Quirky Facts

The Hash House Harriers was started in Kuala Lumpur in 1938 by Albert Gispert. Unfortunately, Albert was killed sometime later during the battle for Singapore. The Mother Hash as it is known, is still an all male event, however there is an all female event in Kuala Lumpur too, as well as a Mountain Bike Hash.

Hashes and Hashers pride themselves on their longevity. Hashes will usually have special bashes for their 500^th, 750^th and 1000^th runs, though every multiple of 50 is considered an auspicious event. Hashers usually are awarded headbands, T-shirts and sometimes pewter mugs for anniversary or ‘jubilee’ runs (usually multiples of 25).

You don’t have to be a FRB (Front Running Bastard) to Hash, though many runners do join Hashes. You can be a SCB (Short Cutting Bastard) like me who lets the FRB’s find the trail and then takes a shortcut to join them {Beware shortcutting can be viewed as a ‘Sin’. Penitence for Hash Sins is usually quaffing Beer in The Circle.} Walkers are welcomed on most Hashes as well.

Geography

Hashes are held ALL over the globe.

Accommodation

Hashers are in general quite a friendly lot and some of them will even put a perfect stranger up for the night.

Transport

Wherever you go, there you are. Hashes are usually done on 2 feet and can cover from 5-10km. Some of the regional events feature ‘Ball-Buster’ 2-3 hour runs, and yet other Hashes are done on Mountain Bikes.

Money

Local currency works well in whatever country you’re in.

Conrad Matt is a software weenie currently working in the Frankfurt, Germany region, counting the weeks until he quits his perfectly good job and goes on a mindless trek to explore this nifty little planet of ours.

“Germany is a good place to practice The Code, specifically article 16. So if you’re in town, drop me a line.”

You can also find him every Monday out and about with the Frankfurt Hash House Harriers.