This is the refrain we locals tend to hear as we wander about the land, and to be honest there are plenty of OAPs in this lovely seaside town - but that's not all. Bournemouth has grown beyond its original reputation of a retirement village and into that of a rocking place to spend the summer months, and that's not just because of the seven miles of golden sand.

The transformation is partly down to the growing university: many many bars, clubs and pubs have sprung up to cater for the student lifestyle and the nightlife now rivals that of Brighton. Then there's some of the clubs themselves, one of which is releasing almost as many albums as the Ministry of Sound or Gatecrasher (nice one!) and organising some massive dance events. To top that, Bournemouth's only a couple of hours out of London and a hop, skip and a jump away from the New Forest and Isle of Purbeck for those wanting to use their Boots'n'All (see below).

Down it!
The age of the student means that Bournemouth's pre-club selection has never been so good. A popular option is Wetherspoon's Moon In The Square - no music, but cheaper than your average pub. A little closer to the beach we find Edwards, once a home for the beautiful people but now a fun place to start the night off, with a great patio area for warm evenings. Then there's Yates' up the hill, fairly similar to the Moon but with pumping sounds and a hilarious selection of hen/stag parties most weekends.

On the hip bar front there are plenty of choices, for instance Bar Med. There may be one in every town in Britain by now, but this one's a good laugh and right by the main centre clubs to boot - just watch out for the Who Wants To Be A Millionaire machine. Bliss recently opened across the road as well, just an tiny bit too poncy and chrome-plated for my taste - perhaps more for those used to Soho nights? The easiest on the wallet has to be Liquids though, and while it is a short walk away from the centre it was still voted the best pre-club bar in Bournemouth last year.

Thump-thump-thump-thump
The largest town centre club is the recently refurbished Elements (once the Cage & Zoo), with a few more rooms and essentially the same music all week - they just shift the DJs so that everyone gets a go on the stage :) Round the corner is Berlins, with the Voodoo Lounge downstairs - definitely at the cheesy end of the market, but generally a cheap option. Comes complete with drinks promotions that change every half hour, courtesy of a game show-style flashing board above the dance floor. On the other side of the square is K-Bar, not a bad night out but definitely smaller than the Elements or Berlins.

By far the biggest night out in Bournemouth is the Opera House, home of Slinky plus albums and events of the same name. This one is in fact an old converted opera house, giving the main room a unique feel and providing a fascinating view from above should all the bouncing wear you out. Great DJs and themed nights cater for the many, but watch out for the fashion police during the busy summer! This club's out of the centre though, so there aren't so many pre-club bars for getting yourself in the mood. Then again, you could test how awake the CCTV division is and attempt your own party on the beach.

Daylight hours
There's loads to do for those who've gotten out of bed and braved the hair of the dog. Top of the list has to be the beach: miles of sand, plenty of sunshine and lots of watersports on offer. If you don't like crowds you might have to walk for a bit, but the many ice cream shacks and fish'n'chip shops will gladly give you the energy to make it.

Next up are the shops: we have plenty of them, from the usual high street brands to Aussie surf labels - just don't expect the waves to match - and since the town centre's pedestrianised you don't have to worry about being run over.

If you're looking for a little fun there's also mini-golf in the Gardens, along with open-air concerts during the summer, and in August there are firework displays after dusk every Friday.

Check out the Tourist Office for more ideas, but whatever you do I hope you have fun in Bournemouth!

Getting there
Coaches from London Victoria are only £20 return, and trains from Waterloo aren't that much more expensive. If you have a car, head southwest down the M3 then M27 - the signs should make life easier from there.

You could try swimming across the Channel if you're in France, but the Poole-Cherbourg ferry's good too. There's also an international airport, but that only stretches to Dublin right now :)

The Big Grey Monstrosity
There is a large grey building on the seafront, blocking some of the lovely view and generally unpopular with all. One day, we are told, this will be an IMAX cinema - but it was meant to open in 2000 at the latest. There are a few pubs and a KFC renting space in there, but for the most part it's just a big grey blot on the landscape. Try ignoring it and visit Harry Ramsden's for some fish'n'chips around the corner, please?

Around and About
On either side of Bournemouth are two historical towns in danger of being swallowed by the upstart piggy in the middle. To the east, Christchurch features windy streets and a 900 year-old priory, plus the ancient hill-fort of Hengistbury Head (technically in Bournemouth) is great for views over the Isle of Wight. Poole, on the other hand, has a lively quayside and the second largest natural harbour in the world - after Sydney of course, though Canadians in Halifax dispute the claim - full of boats to rent and islands to visit.

Just to the east of Bournemouth is the New Forest, though it's actually one of the oldest forests in Britain and close to being made a national park. Highlights include the beautiful heathland, many paths, pretty country villages, and the ponies and deer which run wild. There's also Beaulieu National Motor Museum, a must for anyone who's ever gaped at an engine, and neighbouring Bucklers Hard, preserving the memory of a 19^th century fishing village.

To the south is the Isle of Purbeck, a gorgeous mix of green hills and plunging cliffs. You can visit the ruin of Corfe Castle, destroyed during Britain's Civil War, or walk around the beautiful coastline by Lulworth Cove. If the Army ranges are open you could also try spotting the tank graveyard or some of the rare species which have actually been preserved through the military's ownership of the area.

Questions?
If you want more information about this area you can email the author or check out our Europe Insiders page.